I've been Neva's grandson for nearly 29 years. Many of you have known her longer, some of you have been closer, and all of you have been touched by her kindness and generosity. She was a friend to all of us regardless of our connection to her as family, student, coworker, acquaintance or neighbor. It's that friendship with her that brings us all together today. Instead of mourning a loss, I'd prefer to consider what she has done to enrich each one of our lives. While I summarize her life and its effect on mine I ask that each one of you reflects on what your life has gained from having her in it. We all have a chance to enhance our lives through what she has directly or indirectly taught us.
Grandma Johnson would always brag that she came into this world on the same day as Mickey Mouse. She grew up in the midst of the Great Depression and coupled with the fact that she was the youngest in the family, this helped shape her personality later on in life. While I occasionally heard stories about the nature of her childhood, there was never a complaint. These stories of overcoming hardship were only meant to prove that we all find ourselves in situations where one can't control circumstances but you can always change your perspective to make the most of it. It was this existentialistic type of thinking that taught me one can find fulfillment in any situation. Grandma most certainly did.
She knew how to make friends in nearly any condition and in large number. It was a common joke within our family that no matter where we went with her, she would inevitably know someone and be familiar with their entire life story. Even the mere mention of a last name would invoke memories of someone she knew by the same name. I can only aspire to enjoy the company of a similar quantity with the same quality. Her generosity towards others was to be commended. Her philanthropy wasn’t monetary but emotional. She was always there to help a friend, son, daughter, neighbor, coworker or student. I’ve never seen a calendar as full of appointments with friends as Grandma’s. In fact, while many of us carry around pocket calendars to keep track of our lives, hers was a large calendar placed on her desk. But you always knew that if you made a date to hang out with her, she would be there. It’s that attention to dependability that is easy to dismiss in this day in age where you can cancel an appointment with just a push of a button.
Enjoyment of life was something she excelled at. This involved anything from a good laugh to a good movie to good food. In fact my enjoyment of ice cream may have originated in her house. Her rational for giving my brother Jeff and I the treat on a regular basis was that it’s just “frozen milk”. She also knew how to take pleasure in the company of others. She could make anyone laugh with her dry humor. Actually, sarcastic wit would be a better description. “Just hold your breath for 20 minutes and your hiccups will go away” was one of my favorite sayings. When asked what she’s up to, she would respond without fail, “About 5 feet 2 inches!” She’d strike up a long conversation with the postman, a cashier, her doctor and anybody else she came across each day. Inevitably she’d always crack some satirical gem and get a good chuckle out of her partner in conversation. It was never above her to poke fun at herself. Her lighthearted nature affected many.
Grandma may very well be the best Jeopardy player that has never been on the show. Countless times I would watch her outscore the eventual winner of the night. She was not only intelligent, but had a unique knack for retaining knowledge in all subjects. She was always perceptive and as I suspect many of you know this quality made her an excellent sister, mother, teacher and mentor. She not only knew when you were doing something wrong, but she was acutely aware of when something was troubling you. This also made her an excellent and quick judge of character. The fact that you are here today says a lot about yours.
Perhaps her most prominent attribute of all was her strength. She only missed a couple of days of work in 29 years as a teacher. She endured chemo treatment without much complaint. She rarely portrayed signs of weakness and that was evident from day one to day 29,185. This strength has rubbed off on me as I know it has on many of you.
29,185 days. That’s an eternity to some, but when you break it down to a day at a time and realize what Neva, Mom, Grandma, Mrs. Johnson achieved each one of those days, it adds up to something incredible. My hope is that each of you here will remember Neva as YOU saw her. I hope that you will tuck that memory in your heart and let it touch you a little bit each day. If you saw her wit, I hope that she continues to make you laugh. I suspect that her independence will encourage you to live each moment of your life to the fullest. I hope her strength encourages you to keep moving forward.
I never had the chance until now to officially say goodbye. I don’t regret it. Instead I’m extremely grateful that she didn’t have to suffer long. This gives me more peace of mind than a chance to say the words “goodbye” in person. Goodbye Grandma, thank you and I love you.
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